The Famous Chronicles

23/07/2008

von Hottie is shooting in Times Square today at 2:30 pm! Come and watch, but pretend like you just stumbled upon it!

Photo posted at 12:35

22/07/2008

» All scenes are the same scene

This bit on the New York Magazine blog reminds me of how I feel sometimes in the theater world - especially the downtown theater world. It’s why I sometimes don’t like to even go to the theater - I want to see the show but I have no interest in dealing with the bullshit.

Link posted at 20:02

Comments (View)

» Jezebel.com's Instructional Makeup Video

Slut Machine from Jezebel put together probably one of the best instructional makeup application videos. You have to watch it because:
a) Her model is a man but her mission is a woman’s daytime look.
b) She uses her Hitachi Magic Wand vibrator to apply mascara to see if she can get the same effect as Estee Lauder’s Vibrating Mascara. Yes, that’s right. She uses her vibrator to apply mascara. On a man. That is just better than birthday cake.

Link posted at 19:48

Comments (View)

» Jimmy is featured in Thrillist!

Jimmy Carbone is von Hottie’s #1 fan. I’m standing on his bar in the November picture of the 2008 calendar. Tonight he opened a wine bar and cafe at HERE, where my play, GIANTS, premiered last year.

I was really happy for Jimmy, but super sad that his dreamboat host, Rusty, is moving out of New York tomorrow. Jimmy tried to hook us up last Halloween. He told me to talk to Rusty about the Red Sox and pot. This is how my brilliant pickup went:

Attempt #1
Me: Rusty, do you like the Red Sox?
Rusty: Yeah, I like the Red Sox.
Me: One time I went to Yankees Stadium. [Silence. That was the extent of my knowledge.]

Attempt #2 … Ten minutes later
Me: (Whispering, trying to be sneaky talking about drugs) Rusty, have you ever tried a vaporizer?
Rusty: A what?
Me: A vaporizer.
Rusty: A what?
Me: I know a guy who has one.
Rusty: A what?
Me:[Silence. That was the extent of my knowledge.]

So that went well. And now he’s gone. Eh, I never had much luck with redheads anyway.

Link posted at 01:51

Comments (View)

Holly Golightly moment

I was walking down the street in SoHo, wearing a black cocktail dress, pearls, big sunglasses and red pumps, listening to my friend read the first paragraph of her chick-lit novel about a sassy gal-about-town in New York. We got cut off, but as I was reading the labels of the wine bottles in the liquor store on Spring Street, I pretended to still be on the phone so I could take a moment to watch the reflection of the liquor store employees as they checked me out.

Were they watching me because I looked like Audrey Hepburn or because I’m really a drag queen trapped in the body of a 5’2” woman?

Survey says: DRAG QUEEN!

Text posted at 01:41

Comments (View)

21/07/2008

Want to be a von Hottie intern for a day?

von Hottie’s being filmed for a documentary by kART Across America on Wednesday afternoon. I need an extra hand or two to help out during the photo shoot and interview (hold my coverup and bag, hand out postcards, tell me if I have a wedgie, etc.). It’ll be from 2-6pm on Wednesday afternoon. If you’re interested, contact vonhottie@vonhottie.com. Spread the word if you can!

Text posted at 19:26

Comments (View)