The Famous Chronicles
26/01/2012
» 100 pounds is cooler than 10 pounds
It’s cool that I deadlfited 100 lbs and thought it was 60. It’s weird that I’m supposed to be SO EXCITED that I also lost 10 lbs.
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25/01/2012
This is called “living the dream.” (Taken with instagram)
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23/01/2012
» Where can I buy my own aerial silks?
My aerial silks teacher is smarter and better than Yoda.
Link posted at 17:22
21/01/2012
Hey Kevin, you got a good review in the ladies’ bathroom of Barcade. @rhcomics (Taken with instagram)
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18/01/2012
Tonight: aerial silks to uptown black tie gala to downtown performance art. (Taken with instagram)
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14/01/2012
I don’t care if I’m too old for this, I still really, really want it.
If you spend $47,000 on a toddler bed, you’re too stupid to have children.
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(said in her awesome accent)
- Ellen DeGeneres: Who has more fun: blondes or brunettes?
- Sofia Vergara: I would say the girls with the big boobs
Conversation posted at 01:00
08/01/2012
Very proud of this breakup kit I made for a friend. I was high priestess of the breakup exorcism ritual. We burned incense, threw a condom to the Universe (which the Universe will return as blessings), and paraded around the apartment chanting “om shanti condom” & making jazz hands. (Taken with instagram)
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05/01/2012
I really love pink and when I tried to deny that, I became a cautionary tale for us all.
Wifey expressed some concern on Facebook that, despite not wanting to push gendered products on her unborn bébé boy, she keeps registering for blue things. I was going to suggest that she go for green, or orange, or yellow things, but then I looked at my own colorful (ha!) history and I thought I should offer myself as a cautionary tale:
I really, really, fucking love pink. Not in a “this color is pale and bright and I’m a girl” kind of way, but in a “fuck yeah you can see this color from a mile away, and it is awesome, and when I purchase things that shouldn’t be pink but have been made pink just so I will consume them because girls are supposed to consume pink things, I feel like I cheated the system because, despite knowing better and having been educated a lot on gendered marketing, I still really fucking love pink and pink makes me feel awesome muahahahahaha” kind of way.
Let me tell you, loving pink is a prickly affair. It’s really hard sometimes to simultaneously love pink and have self-respect. Especially when I walk around and every store is seducing me with oodles of pink products that call to me, Come, come, buy us, we made everything pink just so you would buy us. And then I have to stand outside the store like Jennifer Connelly in Labyrinth and yell (inside my head) “YOU HAVE NO POWER OVER ME! I like pink because I like pink, dammit, not because you told me to like pink, you crazy corporate fart faces!” It’s a struggle, guys, and many times my rampant greed/love of pink overcomes my higher intellect and best intentions. If you dissected my soul, you’d find my basest desires scribbled in hot, hot flaming flamingo fuschia. My root chakra is dripping in magenta, and a root chakra is something you cannot deny.
Anyway, at some point I decided I should show some restraint, because I was buying only pink things. Occasionally, I get the impulse to not be excessive - like I’m so whimsical that, just for a lark, I’ll decide not to be whimsical. So I started buying purple things. And gold things. And now all my things are pink, or purple, or gold, and no matter what I do, I walk around all the fucking time looking like a goddam magical unicorn, even when I don’t mean to look like a goddam magical unicorn.
The moral of this story is: if you like something, just go ahead and like it. If you deny yourself, you’ll only make it worse. Also, Wife, if you decorate le petit bébé’s room in green, yellow and orange, it’ll look like sherbert ice cream and you’ll hate it, so my advice is: go blue or go home!
p.s. Riley, I totally respect your right to not love pink.
(Image via.)
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03/01/2012
Every time I see this book, I never buy it. I just turn to the page that has my mom & grandma in it & wave to them (Taken with instagram)
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Dassie’s party rules. More proof that my grandparents partied harder than I ever will. (Taken with instagram)
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01/01/2012
Best New Year’s Day brunch ever: hula & Hawaiian food (Taken with instagram)
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Good morning, 2012. (Taken with instagram)
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On the last day of 2011, I woke up at 4am, drove an hour to watch the sunrise from 10,000 foot elevation at the summit of Haleakala crater, hiked 11.2 miles through the crater with my sisters, wore a lot of neon and drank champagne. On the first day of 2012, I’m realizing I did all this with a twisted ankle and possible bronchitis. (Taken with instagram)
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31/12/2011
von nephew playing with the train. Today we talked about pirates, existentialism, ghosts, Legos, sandcastles & tickling (Taken with instagram)
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