The Famous Chronicles

18/11/2009

turnabout:


meganwest:

After checking with many other zoos across the country, the depressing news was that there were no tiger cubs of the right age to introduce to the mourning mother. The veterinarians decided to try something that had never been tried in a zoo environment. Sometimes a mother of one species will take on the care of a different species. The only orphans that could be found quickly, were a litter of weaner pigs. The zoo keepers and vets wrapped the piglets in tiger skin and placed the babies around the mother tiger.

THAT IS THE CUTEST THING EVER.  THAT HAS MADE MY DAY.

turnabout:

meganwest:

After checking with many other zoos across the country, the depressing news was that there were no tiger cubs of the right age to introduce to the mourning mother. The veterinarians decided to try something that had never been tried in a zoo environment. Sometimes a mother of one species will take on the care of a different species. The only orphans that could be found quickly, were a litter of weaner pigs. The zoo keepers and vets wrapped the piglets in tiger skin and placed the babies around the mother tiger.

THAT IS THE CUTEST THING EVER.  THAT HAS MADE MY DAY.

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tylercoates:

I made a choice.



YAY! We’re seeing this at almost the same time only I’ll be in New York! And first I’m eating at Chevy’s! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

tylercoates:

I made a choice.

YAY! We’re seeing this at almost the same time only I’ll be in New York! And first I’m eating at Chevy’s! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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16/11/2009

vonhottie:

Please save the evening of Wednesday, December 2nd for the party celebrating the release of the von Hottie 2010 calendar!

vonhottie:

Please save the evening of Wednesday, December 2nd for the party celebrating the release of the von Hottie 2010 calendar!

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I want to make this a national franchise.

I want to make this a national franchise.

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12/11/2009

allthelatestmoves:

shiningstar:

Youtube Video of the Day: Carrie Prejean ‘Storms Off’ on Larry King Live

Just another episode of ‘Inappropriate King Live…’ Hilarity.

She sucks.

My friend was wearing the same Forever 21 sweater at dinner the other night.

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vonhottie:

Sassletic & von Hottie won a gift certificate to Salt restaurant in NYC for completing the Eat.Sweat.Blog challenge on SocialWorkout.com!!!

vonhottie:

Sassletic & von Hottie won a gift certificate to Salt restaurant in NYC for completing the Eat.Sweat.Blog challenge on SocialWorkout.com!!!

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11/11/2009

Tonight I took my first aerial silks class at The House of Yes. I didn’t expect to be fantastic at it, and I wasn’t. I did do a couple of inversions and I did get about 3 inches off the ground, which was wildly thrilling to me and caused me to giggle (upside down) while exclaiming, “Wheee!”

So, new goal: Hula hoop while rollerskating over to my aerial silks, which I will fly from with abandon.

I recommend the class. It was $30 and for only an hour-long group class, you got a lot of time on the silks. Unlike Pole Dancing at Crunch. Information on the class here.

Photo of my instructor, Jordann Baker, taken by Ryan Muir, via The Brooklyn Vegan.

Tonight I took my first aerial silks class at The House of Yes. I didn’t expect to be fantastic at it, and I wasn’t. I did do a couple of inversions and I did get about 3 inches off the ground, which was wildly thrilling to me and caused me to giggle (upside down) while exclaiming, “Wheee!”

So, new goal: Hula hoop while rollerskating over to my aerial silks, which I will fly from with abandon.

I recommend the class. It was $30 and for only an hour-long group class, you got a lot of time on the silks. Unlike Pole Dancing at Crunch. Information on the class here.

Photo of my instructor, Jordann Baker, taken by Ryan Muir, via The Brooklyn Vegan.

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09/11/2009

von Hottie: what's really waiting at the end of the rainbow

vonhottie:

Dear von Hottie,

we made friends with 6 new gay men in the past 2 weeks.  Six!!!  it’s an embarrassment of riches.  and we owe it all to you.

Love, XXXX

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05/11/2009

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04/11/2009

The serial killers in my play really like this song.

And right before they sing this song, they sang some Careless Whisper.

These women are out of control! We need some Spanx up in here.

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“ Basically, I realized, I was living in that awful stage of life from the age of twenty-six to thirty-seven known as stupidity. It’s when you don’t know anything, not even as much as you did when you were younger, and you don’t even have a philosophy about all the things you don’t know, the way you did when you were twenty or would again when you were thirty-eight. „

Lorrie Moore, Anagrams (via tylercoates)

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31/10/2009

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Time Out New York Naked Shoot

I’m not even sure what the best part of today was …
- The 10 people getting into 1950s cocktail hair, makeup & wardrobe in my apartment in only and hour and a half!
- The journalist hanging out in my living room, sipping prosecco & jotting down everything everyone said.
- Running to the bathroom yelling, “I’ve got to wash my nipples!”
- Putting on the pasties and then triumphantly exclaiming, “Check out my nipple flowers!” They were lacy. I was excited.
- Opening the door wearing a very little wrap and hot rollers, expecting to see one of my friends but instead seeing the UPS man. Whoops.
- Getting a case of prosecco delivered to my apartment before everyone arrived.
- Opening 3 bottles before the shoot. Opening 6 after.
- One of my friends saying, “You’re one of 4 people that can coax me out of my self-absorption.”
- Raiding my fridge for Girl Scout cookies, which got everyone very excited.
- Handing a hanger full of pearl necklaces for my friend to carry across the street to the photo shoot.
- Arriving at the location, standing half-naked while my friend stitched pearl necklaces on me.
- Needing 12 packs of pearl necklaces opened immediately. Screeching, “I need assistance” and having everyone rush over and form this beautiful little sweatshop assembly line. Then apologizing profusely for having yelled.
-Reminding everyone they were all on “vag patrol.”
-Waddling over to the couch for the shoot, covering my woo-hoo with a red glitter heart.
- Liz blowing bubbles in my face.
-Looking around and realizing I’d convinced 9 people to hang out in cocktail attire while I was naked, and they all seemed to think it was a great idea, too.
-Looking over at my wife, realizing she wasn’t a theater person like the rest but she really pulls through her stage fright when I need her.
- Amanda being referred to by the photographer as “Crying Girl On the Left”
-Kate’s amazing playlist she made in the car on the way to my apartment.
- The photographer asking me to switch up poses and trying to figure out how to change my look without disrupting the delicately draped pearls. I settled for head angles. The shoulders had to remain stationery.
-The powder girl had the softest powder brush. I wanted to marry it. I kind of purred every time she powdered me.
- Walking back across the street to my apartment, wearing only a robe, 15 lbs of pearls and heels, surrounded by my von-tourage.
- And then, getting everyone drunk in my apartment and making all their Girl Scout cookie dreams come true.

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30/10/2009

shoes

shoes

pearls

pearls

vonhottie:

Tomorrow, von Hottie will be wearing these two things … and a smile.

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