January 2012
14 posts
100 pounds is cooler than 10 pounds →
It’s cool that I deadlfited 100 lbs and thought it was 60. It’s weird that I’m supposed to be SO EXCITED that I also lost 10 lbs.
Where can I buy my own aerial silks? →
My aerial silks teacher is smarter and better than Yoda.
(said in her awesome accent)
Ellen DeGeneres: Who has more fun: blondes or brunettes?
Sofia Vergara: I would say the girls with the big boobs
I really love pink and when I tried to deny that,...
Wifey expressed some concern on Facebook that, despite not wanting to push gendered products on her unborn bébé boy, she keeps registering for blue things. I was going to suggest that she go for green, or orange, or yellow things, but then I looked at my own colorful (ha!) history and I thought I should offer myself as a cautionary tale:
I really, really, fucking love pink. Not in a “this...
December 2011
12 posts
My 3 year old godmuffin's wish list: princess...
I’ve got the exact same wish list, except I want a champagne pony or a Mark Ruffalo pony.
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November 2011
21 posts
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The lecture I like to give every time a new...
If a girl says she’s Team Jacob, you know she has her priorities straight. If you’re Team Werewolf, you don’t have to abandon food, alcohol, coffee or your loved ones, and you still get hot supernatural sex. Don’t give up coffee or booze just to be with some cold dude. That is whack. Even if he does sparkle like a diamond. You know what else sparkles like a diamond?...
“When Bella and Edward kiss at the altar, you’ll hear applause in your theater...”
– Dan Kois reviews the Twilight movie, makes us laugh really fucking hard (via villagevoice)
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October 2011
13 posts
If you need a costume idea, I suggest Zombie von...
vonhottie:
Wear a bathing suit, pearls, blood and stumble around muttering, “Champ-braaaaaaaiiinnns.”