The Famous Chronicles
18/11/2011
The lecture I like to give every time a new Twilight movie comes out.
If a girl says she’s Team Jacob, you know she has her priorities straight. If you’re Team Werewolf, you don’t have to abandon food, alcohol, coffee or your loved ones, and you still get hot supernatural sex. Don’t give up coffee or booze just to be with some cold dude. That is whack. Even if he does sparkle like a diamond. You know what else sparkles like a diamond? Sunlight! Go werewolf, and you can have that too. You’re welcome.
p.s. I’m seeing it on Sunday. Wife, I’ll be thinking of you the whole time.
Text posted at 01:08
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